Loneliness and Older Folk

Loneliness is something that is on my agenda and has been for years.  I am reminded that my situation is as a result of my choices in life, and I agree, but it doesn’t make things different.  I have almost always been lonely. I thought at one stage it was because I changed schools often – and really had no real buddy school friends.  I didn’t connect with any of my fellow school students.  I was different.  I was a reader – spending a lot of solo time with my books. I played tennis but didn’t bond with anyone from the tennis club.  I was a Girl Guide and while I had many friends, no one became a  long time friend/buddy.

I made a strong friendship with a lady I met at the Jill Dempster Model Academy, and we spent a lot of time together.  We even went to Perth (from our home state of South Australia) for the Empire and Commonwealth Games in  Empire Games in 1962, and had a great time together.  We kept in touch for quite a few years later, but I left Adelaide to do my nursing training in Mt Gambier and she married, and we went our own ways.

Nursing Friends

During my nursing training days, I had many great friends, but as time went on and I moved frequently, there were only a few friends left.  One who has remained a close friend lives on the west coast of Australia and I live on the east coast  We are still good friends, and both single now, we are still good friends, but don’t see each other often.

Family

I left my home state when I married, leaving behind aunts, uncles, cousins, parents and sister, niece and nephew and the few numbers of friends I had, and connections to places and people.

As it turns out I moved around in Victoria, New South Wales and Queensland, as my husband’s employment changed.  I love living in Queensland and will remain here, but I am aware that the decisions I made have “removed” me from my old life.  Would I have more friends and family connections if I had remained in South Australia?  Perhaps.  The many visits to family, from Brisbane to Adelaide and Melbourne over the years did impact on my life.  But it is what it is.

The Life of Seniors

As a senior now – most of my friends and connections are over 60 years.  I have been involved in the housing for older people sector, support services for seniors and more.  I tend to have a lot of female friends who are reliant on the “aged pension” to fund their lives, and for those who are renting, it is a big challenge.  Oh, and I know many women in their own homes who are finding it difficult to keep up with everything with limited income.

Quite a few of my friends are reliant on the government for housing, medical services and more.  While it is much appreciated by us all, it does come with plenty of “challenges”.  Loneliness is a big issue with many.

We all know that in our world, it appears that the rich are getting richer, and the poor are getting poorer, and that successive governments do very little to change the situation.

Housing Shortage in Australia

I find it astounding that successive governments have paid little notice of the housing shortage issue, which has been part of our world for 20 years.  It was over 20 years ago that I started speaking with politicians about the situation at the time.  And at that time I was happily in my own home, with no idea that I would be homeless around 10 years later.

Meeting with federal and state housing ministers didn’t get the reaction that I was hoping for.  It appeared that they had little concept of the issues.

I remember only a few years ago, when I was seeking a rental property that I came face-to-face with the realities.  The number of terrible, poorly maintained properties I was shown, with a rental which was certainly too expensive for someone on a pension.  I was appalled at the low standard of housing that had a high rental!!!

This last week I picked up a 80+ lady in a private rental.  The property was a house renovated to a duplex, but it was clearly not well maintained.  Rust, peeling paint, horrible old house – and she lives alone in her part of the house.  Sadly her neighbours are not particularly friendly either.  She has no family locally – with her daughter working in Europe.   I feel so sorry for her – but I know that this appears to be acceptable for landlords, and apparently governments. She is alone and lonely.

We have to make changes. I will continue my work.